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The Suitcase Band
It's hard to believe in Adam and Eve in
The garden of Eden, just doing the weeding
On a winning streak from morning to evening
I’m sure you’re agreeing so here's my re-reading;
Here are the bare facts, this is the naked truth
They haven't got a stitch to wear, they're always in the nude
Adam doesn't give a fig, it's all he ever knew
and so it doesn't seem rude to wear his birthday suit
But up in Paradise, there are seeds of a dispute.
Adam's had some fruit; Eve can see it in his throat
As it rises and it falls, Eve’s eyes follow
She’d like to have a bite "What is it that he's swallowed?"
“What has he been given? Why's he keep it hidden?
Why is it forbidden?” But Adam just won't listen
She’s just a spare rib and it’s only the beginning
This is not the way he should be treating women!
But she’s not stopping, there’s nothing Eve’s dropping,
This worm in her mind won't settle, be forgotten
There’s an apple in his barrel and she’s feeling rotten
Every time he gulps she wants to get to the bottom
Nothing else matters and she's really getting rattled
And she thinks there's nothing that'll stop the tittle tattle,
So she grabs Adam's apple and they tumble and they grapple
They wrestle and they fumble as they rumble in the jungle
The fruit juice drips, he licks it from her lips,
And he's tickling her ribs, she's squeezing his pips,
His hands, her hips, he's at her fingertips
Her concentration slips and she’s losing her grip
She notices his snakedness, Adam's more awakedness
She thinks "Where is he placing this? Where are we taking this?
Is this ok or wickedness? Is there a time and place for this?
I don't feel like missing this; Where on earth's the sin in this?
What decision should I take? Am I making a mistake?
Is there a rule I’m going to break? What are the rules for heaven's sake?
Should I stick or should I twist? Oh I like the taste of this!”
So it turns into a kiss and we know what follows this
Adam & Eve It
"Well that was original!" Says Adam feeling practical
"Shall we write a manual?" Then yawned and began to fall
asleep but Eve don't mind at all; She is feeling beautiful,
Biblical, sensible, half a mind on birth control
“While Adam's feeling sleepy, think I'll make a leaf bikini.
I don't want him super keeny every single time he sees me."
Meanwhile in the trees, the birds and the bees
Had watched the scene and seen it all and learnt what was
possible
Within weeks of the creation, there was sex education
The key to procreation and increasing population
Mankind's continuation and a form of recreation,
Thank God Eve gave into temptation.
It’s the end of the song and we haven’t got a python
Eve picks up the apple with a bit on
The symbol of jealousy it ought to be an icon
Why don’t we stick it on the back of the iphone?